Days of Peace Starring Shikamaru and Temari
by RonsInnerVoice
Summary: Chapter 4: Another short drabble; feral women are AWESOME.
1. Why Naps Are So Great

_Sigh… I hate writing about troublesome things…. So I will be avoiding the current situation in Naruto right now…. Let's all go back to the days of relative peace so we can enjoy ShikaTema properly._

Why Naps Are So Great.

Peace.

Tranquility.

Those were the only things he asked for. Those were the only things he ever thought mattered. But the situation had gotten so bad that he no longer knew what these things were. If it wasn't one thing it was the other… Sometimes he felt that the universe was ganging up to make his life as troublesome as possible.

Or it could just be a lazy bum's lazy opinion.

Shikamaru sighed to himself as he made his way down the road. It was such a nice afternoon. So nice and quiet and cool and windy all at the same time.

_Perfect_ nap conditions.

Which was probably why he had been forced into some goddamn 'C' mission in god knows where.

The universe. What a joker.

Although he didn't mind easy missions, what he minded was traveling to another country to carry it out. But he couldn't say no… or rather he hadn't been able to come up with a suitable enough excuse.

The Godaime wasn't buying anymore fake injuries and besides… she had come up with an ingenious solution to ensure that he wouldn't fake an injury. The last time he had tried, she had sent him home to his parents to 'recuperate'.

No more fake injuries since then.

He paused as he came to the Hokage's office, mentally regretting the loss of a wonderful nap day. Then, sighing for what seemed like the thousandth time today, he entered the building.

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He could barely believe his luck. They cancelled the mission. And before the Godaime or Sakura could scramble around for another one, he had practically run off.

Well he didn't actually run; it was too tiring to do so. But he had been able to sneak past those two and stealthily make his way out of there. Until they could somehow manage to find him and issue him with new orders, he was free.

He narrowed his eyes as he stood in the back-alley, pondering where he could escape to. There were two obvious places that he was bound to be on a day like this; the park or on some roof-top… meaning he had to avoid both locations.

And he couldn't go back to his apartment as Sakura would just bust down the door. She had done that once on the request of his mother. Besides it was kinda cramped in there… and he never usually hung out there unless someone else was in Konoha…

He coughed to himself and thanked his stars that she wasn't around however. If she was, she would be irritating him to go and do his job. Like as though he didn't have enough women nagging him already.

They usually hung out there as she didn't like to be seen with him in public. Not that he complained, as being seen with her in public would also mean getting troublesome looks from people around him.

Not that they ever behaved in any way to even suggest that they were more than… acquaintances. But it just seemed everyone knew his business. Probably due to one big-mouthed kunoichi who he also thankfully hadn't seen around. She was probably with Chouji bugging him about something. Irritating girl.

Anyway, he reminded himself, he had other things to worry about. He had best get out of here before anyone caught him. As un-sneakily as possible, (trying not to act suspicious made you more suspicious) he nonchalantly walked through the alleys keeping an eye out for anyone who may have been looking for him.

Truth was… there was a spot he could go. But it was very dangerous.

This spot was arguably the Numero Uno of nap spots. The best of the best. The top dawg. And one of the reasons that it was so was because no one knew of it. No one. He had managed all this while to keep it a secret by only using it when no one was looking for him. Even Chouji, Ino and his parents didn't know about it. Neither did that troublesome woman which made it all the more attractive. It was a spot to be free of them all.

But to use it now, (whoops, just slip quickly behind this door to avoid Ino and Sakura) would mean quite possibly exposing its location to people who were looking for him.

And if this was lost, this last bastion of his, his last escape, then there was no longer a place he could ever be comfortable.

Shikamaru paused, as he crouched behind the dumpster as his mother walked past. He was being a tad dramatic here he supposed but well… some people felt strongly about certain things and this was something he felt very strongly about. Naps were more than just a hobby; it was his way of life. They should call him the Nap Sage, he mused. Peeking from the side to see if the coast was clear, he calmly made his way through the bushes towards the park. Which should have been a dumb idea.

But the best place to hide was in the most obvious place.

Of course, he was aware that Sakura and Ino had earlier been making their way to the park. They were probably waiting to ambush him out at the front. The afternoon sun hid behind a cloud as he continued to calmly make his way through the bushes to a spot that he could watch and plan around them.

He spotted them both on a bench, typically arguing about some random thing. There were a group of girl genins having an outdoor lesson, chattering excitedly making lots of noise. He guessed that must have been what Ino and Sakura were arguing about, the sight of those girls bringing to mind their long-time friendship/enmity.

He grinned to himself; amateurs. Allowing themselves to be distracted so easily. He looked up into the sky watching the white clouds stroll by cheerfully. Heh, that one even looked like a certain kunoichi's head…. He grinned again, already hearing the sharp retort in his mind if he had told her that.

A sharp, sudden longing struck him making him come back to his senses. He rubbed the back of his head ruefully before focusing back on his task. In front of him, the genins had stopped their lesson to stare at the racket that the two idiot kunoichis were making. He rolled his eyes as he walked past them; so engrossed in their name calling that they didn't even see him.

He quickly ducked into a path that was hardly used, which led to a deeper part of the park. Konoha was essentially still a forest and there were still clumps that people didn't normally enter. He walked purposefully, excited about the chance to sleep the afternoon away.

And he never even noticed the shadow behind him.

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He zig-zagged quickly almost, almost but never breaking into a run. He loved this spot and when he had first found it, it seemed a godsend. He broke through a group of seemingly impregnable trees and stood to admire what nature had created. It was even more fantastic than he had remembered… or so he though every time he came here. The universe may have been out to get him, but at least it gave him this.

The soft sunlight, the cool and green grass and the shady trees. Everything about it was perfect especially the fact that no on knew about it.

He made his way to his favorite spot and laid himself on it, letting loose a contented sigh. Well it was a little chilly with the wind and clouds, but all in all, still fantastic. He yawned; one of the many that would soon follow as he peacefully drifted off.

This was peace.

This was life.

Could this moment get better than this?

Cue, Universe.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------"There are times," he started, hearing a voice behind him, "that I can't imagine that you could possibly get any lazier." He sat up quickly, all thoughts of naps out his head and whirled around looking for the source of the voice.

That troublesome woman look back at him condescendingly, "And then I am proven completely wrong." He glared back at her, furious with himself.

She snorted at him as he turned away, a scowl on his face. "What's the matter pineapple-head? Angry I found your little hiding spot?"

He scowled again, now it was all ruined. His last perfect spot… He watched out of the corner of his eye as she walked around, getting a look at her surroundings.

She stopped in front of his feet, looking down at him. "Although this is a rather nice spot." He mumbled back something to her. "What?" She looked at him sharply.

He sighed, "This _was_ a nice spot…"

She glared at him a bit before walking over to stand under the trees. "Just lying like that where anyone could just walk in and catch you." She shook her head, "Thought you were smarter than that."

He replied without opening his eyes, "No one knows about this place."

She rolled her eyes, "I do. It was so easy to follow you. You were like some giddy genin so excited that you never even knew I was behind you."

"You mean stalking," he said sitting up and stretching his arm, "You were stalking me."

She didn't respond, just continued to look at the back of his head. They just remained in silence for a few more seconds till she snorted. "Just wasting a day lying around… tsk what would happen if someone walked in and saw you like this?

He rolled his eyes, "I told you, no one knew about this place. The only way to find it would be to sneakily follow some innocent guy like a common thief."

Once again, she didn't respond. He still didn't turn around, wondering if maybe he had gone a bit too far. She didn't like being spoken to like that although she had no problem treating him like that.

He turned around, realizing that she was looking at the sky. She looked a little tired, actually, hands fiddling with the help of her skirt. She was a little quiet and that was not normal of this woman.

He watched as she suddenly stood straight and stretched her back. Without a word she turned away probably to make her way back through the park. He bit back a sigh; he was happy to be left alone, but… he had missed her.

She paused in front of the trees, checking to see where it was that she had come from. Damn that jerk. Just damn him. She hoped it would rain and soak him into the ground. Calling her that when she was just… just a little tired and just wanted to….

_Whatever_. She turned around to give him one last scornful look, only to catch him looking at her. They looked at each other until he finally sighed and got up. She raised an eyebrow as he walked in her direction.

But, he only stopped in front of his jacket which he had dropped earlier. Picking it up, he walked back to his spot. She clenched her fist; sometimes she really felt like just hitting him so hard that his….

Wait a minute. He had dropped the jacket next to him, but not in a throw it down on the floor manner. He had spread it out next to him, in a way that someone could sit down without getting any grass stains on her skirt. Then without saying a word, he dropped back down on the grass, resting his head in his hands and looking up.

Wellll… she was the first to admit that she was a little proud. But she sorta also knew how much it meant for him to invite her down next to him here. In Shikamaru's terminology, it meant a lot. And she was tired…

Shikamaru yawned as she sat down next to him, fan laid aside. She stretched her long legs (he loved it when she did that) before crossing them and leaning back on her arms. She was a lot more casual than he expected.

He forced himself not to look at her legs as he watched the clouds rolled by, the both of them comfortable in their silence. She clucked her tongue before saying sarcastically, "Couldn't you have chosen a more obvious place?" He rolled his eyes as she went on, "I mean an enemy could just stroll up and stab you while you dream away about clouds or games and what else that empty head of yours dreams of…"

You, Shikamaru thought to himself.

He cast a lazy glance her way, "For the third time woman, no one and I repeat no one knows about this place."

She snorted, sticking her tongue at him. He fought an urge to grin. She was being very, very relaxed today. Normally outside the confines of his room, she wouldn't even so much smile at him. She always acted like he didn't even exist sometimes.

She gestured around her, "This place is right in the middle of the park isn't it… Someone could just walk up to here and you wouldn't know a thing." He gave her a look as he shivered slightly in the wind; this was getting a little old.

"If you are so afraid that someone might see you being civil to me, you're free to go woman…" She rolled her eyes back at him, not bothering to answer.

Since she didn't seem to want to say anything else, he closed his eyes and tried to get warm. He would have liked his jacket back but it would be impossible to ask her for it. Out of spite probably, she would purposely hold onto it. That was them.

Anyway she would probably leave by herself when she felt like it and he could take it back then. She normally never bothered to tell him if she was leaving; just up and leave him without a word.

Even in his apartment, he never really knew what she was doing there… other than scolding him, or insulting him. They always sat far apart, she on the chair and he on the bed or the other way around. They were never within touching distance of each other… and he knew better than to break the rule. He was admittedly content to have her like that… even if he didn't know just what they were.

She always came to see him there… always. She would make him buy something to eat and they would just sit in there in silence or just hang…. It was un-troublesome which was the way he liked it… even though they were days when she would throw her head back and laugh and he wondered what it would be like to wrap his arms aro-

"Oi… bum are you already asleep?"

He resisted the urge to open his eyes. Maybe if he just forced himself, he would fall asleep for real. Sometimes, she was really just too damn troublesome. He heard her mumbling again about how someone could just walk into the glade but he didn't rise to the bait this time. Giving a non-committal grunt, he tried to get himself comfortable.

And all of a sudden realized that he was a lot warmer than he should be. It was the kind of warmth of having someone near you. She was still just sitting, but for some reason, she was a lot nearer than he remembered.

Trying his best not to show any reaction, he cracked open an eye slightly, watching as she yawned. Cute. If only she would remain that way all the time.

He watched as she reached for her fan and quickly shut his eyes as he felt the warmth of her body as she reached over and placed the fan behind his head, below the tree. He was confused; just what on earth was she up to now? Was she trying to pound him or something?

And then, she lay back. It wasn't just dropping her back on to the ground. It was a more deliberate action… and then though she got back up immediately. She frowned and dusted off some grass from her blouse. He couldn't really get a good view of her face from his position although he could hear her grumble something about grass.

He dared himself to open his eye again, watching her look up at the clouds, legs stretched out in front of her. And then…. slowly but very surely, she moved towards him.

It was slow. She moved as though in deep thought as she reached out to close the distance between them. Now their sides were touching as he forced himself not to react. She still hadn't looked at him directly as she remained in that position for a while. Her warmth was suffusing him, making him feel hot and slightly bothered. He considered adjusting himself, but he wasn't quite sure it could get better than this.

Oh wait. Just wait a goddamn minute.

He watched as she stretched her arms over her head before twisting slightly to slowly but carefully and deliberately lay her head on his chest. Her left hand was still in between them but her right hand drifted a bit more to rest on his chest next to his head.

For a while he could not move, let alone think rationally.

He was pretty damn sure she could feel his heart pounding fit to burst. How could she not? He had to force himself to breathe normally. She adjusted herself slightly and let out a small sigh. Again she yawned; using her right hand to cover her mouth before returning it back to its position, but this time a little more towards his waist.

A million questions flew through his head. But he couldn't even bring himself to voice one out. What was he supposed to do now? This scenario was implausible no matter the circumstances, or so he thought. Never could he have imagined….

He wondered what to say, but before he could open his mouth, she said clearly, "Shut up pineapple-head."

He looked at the top of her head, feeling the braids brush his face and decided he would. Her hair was right in front of him… the closest he had ever come to being able to smell it before was the fragrance that remained in his apartment after she left. Now it wasn't just within distance, it was right in his goddamn arms.

What the hell he thought. He lifted his body forward, causing her to jerk her head around at him, but he wasn't looking at her. Removing one hand he reached out and wrapped the hand around her waist, pulling her closer towards him. And the surprises continued as to his amazement, she didn't resist, instead, adjusted her own body, trying to get comfortable, but ultimately closer to him.

He could feel her body pressing against him as he pretended to adjust his shoulder but all the while re-positioning her face into his neck area. She made a small noise that he couldn't identify. All he knew was that her face was suddenly buried in the spot right below his neck. Her warm breath was tickling him, but he could not imagine a more delicious feeling at that moment. Her right hand suddenly edged its way upwards, to lay itself gently just below his neck, her fingers brushing against his collarbone.

He had never been more comfortable in his life.

That universe. What a joker.

He yawned. Nice day to nap, he thought.

Story based on Interlude by Paintpixel


	2. No one likes ice water thrown on them

How was it that no one had tried to smash his head in? There he was, sleeping away in full-view of everyone and no one even said a thing.

Temari ground her teeth, forcing herself to unclench her palms. The meeting droned on around her as she focused her stare hoping to burn a wake-up-jerk thought into his empty head.

Not even the slightest movement.

She wondered how it was that he could sleep so peacefully in just about anywhere. Whether they were in a forest or desert or even in some smelly swamp. He always fell asleep as soon as he was allowed to. Or even when he wasn't allowed to.

Just last week in Suna, she had told him to wait for a few minutes as she got changed and when she came out of her room, he was fast asleep on the couch.

At least that time there had been no one around so it had been much easier to fill the cup with ice-water and pour it on him. But now they were in a meeting for god sakes... And she had no way to reach across the table to smack him as hard as she was dearly wishing she could.

She sighed to herself as she tried to catch the thread of the discussion. Something about kunai smuggling or whatever... She forced a smile on her face as some joke was said. The discussion carried on as she tried not to glance at her... her...

That goddamned ass.

She had always been a curser, although she had improved considerably over the years to keeping those curses in her mind only. But this lazy insufferable pineapple head just kept bring it out of her.

Admittedly, the meeting was not the most engaging and it was a slight effort to pay attention. But they were the official representatives for heaven's sake. He was embarrassing Konoha… and her as well.

She wasn't quite sure why but it felt personal sometimes the way his laziness came into play. Like when he sometimes refused to move his arm just because, as he claimed, it was too troublesome to do so. It was her waist dammit, and she had every right to want it to be left arm-free.

She wondered what the people in the meeting would do if she just reached out for that ponytail, pulled it off the table then smashed that head back down. It would certainly make her feel better, that was true.

Temari found herself daydreaming of the various and violent ways she could wake the idiot when she suddenly heard her name called out. Looking around quickly, she realized a question had been asked of her.

And she had no idea what it was.

The puzzled look of the faces around her grew as she gave a weak smile. And it was too embarrassing if she had to ask what the question was. She coughed, trying to buy time as her mind furiously tried to remember what the discussion had been about?

"Err... i think..." As she glanced around, she nearly swallowed her tongue as she suddenly saw the object of her affection/ire looking back at her, wide awake. It was as though he hadn't been spending the last few minutes passed out on the desk, happily in dreamland.

And what made things more exasperating was that he was holding some note in his hand directed at her. She could hardly count the emotions running through her head. Squinting she could see the note said, "They asked about the status of the Chunnin exam?"

Oh... how she hated him. Seriously. Whatever there was between them, hate wasn't far away. It was always present in some form or the other in whatever they did. And in times like this, it just seemed to be the only thing that connected them.

The nerve of him. And that she had no choice but to get his help. She hated that. Getting his help. Having to ensure his silent gloating.

She cleared her throat again, "The Chunnin exam has been going on fine and we will keep to the same location as the last few years. We hope that you will..."

Her voice trailed off as the confused looks on the faces grew. There was a silence as everyone either had a look of confusion on their face or was looking away embarrassedly.

The guy who had asked the question in the first place, gave an embarrassed cough before saying," I was actually asking if Suna had any increased activity of kunai smuggling?"

_The whole room seemed to suddenly go silent then._

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To her immense credit, she didn't pause for long and neither did she blush that badly. She answered quickly and to the point and the discussion quickly turned away from her, sensing her embarrassment.

She kept her view to the front of the table this time. Not once did she turn to face the representative from Konoha who constantly yawned away during the rest of the meeting. And after the end of the meeting, she picked up her papers and smiled at one or two people before making her way back to her hotel room.

As the bellhop passed by her in the hall, he gave her a respectful bow but it seemed that she didn't see him. Normally he would have asked if she wanted anything, but it seems that she was a little distracted. Strangely, he noticed that her teeth seemed to clench a little harder as she passed the Konoha representative's room door. He shrugged as he made his way back to the front desk, it wasn't really his problem.

If he had stayed a few more minutes, he might have seen her back track to the said room door.

* * *

_That night… _

The bell hop looked in dumb amazement as they gazed at the sheer damage of the room. The Konoha repr- Nara-san had called him and asked him to help him carry some packages to his room but when he opened the door; his mouth just dropped open as he stared. The bed was destroyed, the bags strewn about and the pillows had been ripped apart. It was the scene of some great disaster. Nara-san on the other hand, didn't even flinch as he stood there surveying the carnage. The bell-hop tried to say something but nothing came out of his mouth. It hadn't looked this way in the morning when room service was cleaning and no one had been to the room since them.

Nara-san patted him on the shoulder as he took the packages from the bell-hop and threw them onto the bed. He even told him not to worry about it as he gave him a lazy grin and promised to pay for the damages tomorrow. The bell-hop made his way back to the front desk wondering what kind of monsters had been in the hotel.


	3. Don't Bang On Shikamaru's Door

"Why do we always have to go so early, "grumbled Kiba as he trudged towards the apartments blocks near the southern edge of Konoha. "Having a late breakfast is perfectly fine with me."

Shino didn't bother to answer as he accompanied his teammate down the quiet street. Whining about everything was a specialty of Kiba and no amount of growing up would ever get him to stop. He was still the best in Konoha at it, lately even surpassing Naruto.

Shino gently nudged Kiba in the side, potentially stopping him from tripping on the crack in the pavement and smashing his face into the ground; although… that might have actually stopped him from talking and being irritating.

He fought the urge to roll his eyes; that would have been a very Kiba thing to do. Thankfully, they spotted Neji ahead of them, calmly regarding them, pretending that he too was not being affected by his hyperactive teammate.

They came to a stop and Kiba dropped to the ground even as Rock greeted them enthusiastically, pounding on Kiba's back but thankfully remembering not to do the same to Shino. The one and only time he had tried, it had been disastrous, crushing all the insects located in the affected area. That time Shino had not only rolled his eyes, he had even sighed. But it was hard to be too angry at someone who didn't have a mean bone in his body and had apologized so fervently. Shino just nodded enigmatically and dashed home to placate the remaining insects and apply as much lotion to his back.

He looked at Neji and nodded, more to acknowledge their troublesome teammates than to greet each other. Kiba was still moaning and whining about how he needed more sleep and Rock was, again at the top of his voice, greeting some shinobi that had the misfortune to pass by. Thankfully the next addition to the group was Chouji, someone who chose his words wisely and was not afraid to keep them buried in his head. The three of them nodded at each other, watching the antics of the other two.

If there was something that Shino and Neji both feverishly agreed upon was that how lucky Shikmaru was that his teammate was Chouji; although he had to put up with his share of annoyance from Ino, who was on another totally higher level of annoyance. But inevitably, in most of the teams, the guys ended spending most of their time together and it was an absolute blessing to have one who was not whiny or irritating or troublesome.

He never admitted it, but sometimes he pondered if Sasuke had left the village because he had been grouped together with the, hands-down, most annoying teammates in the village. For all their skills, talents and other positive attributes, no one could deny how irritating the combination of Sakura and Naruto were. Not that he would ever propose that theory to anyone, but he had a feeling that Neji might surreptitiously agree with him. Hiding a smile in the depths of his coat, he said, "Has anyone woken Naruto up?"

No answer from Chouji or Neji but not that he expected any. Kiba hadn't heard the question but Rock cheerfully exclaimed, "Yes! He will be here any second no-

"GUYS!" shouted the said hyperactive devil.

Naruto glanced around the group, "Let's go! What are we waiting for?"

Kiba snorted, "Shikamaru's still not here, doofus!"

Naruto scrunched his face, "Then let's go get him and go! Come on I'm starving here" he whined. Grabbing Kiba off the ground, they started to argue about something as Shino sighed to himself and gave Neji another look. Slowly, the group started moving towards Shikamaru's apartment which was just a few blocks down the road.

Kiba and Naruto were still arguing and before it reached the snarling phase, Neji suddenly cut it, "Kiba, where is Akarmaru today morning?"

Kiba paused to give Naruto a I'll-deal-with-you-later look before replying, "He's still with my sis. That stuff from the Grass-nin is still messing with our noses. Our olfactory sense is totally out of sync. "

Chouji glanced at him, "You still can't identify scents?"

Kiba shrugged," Not that I can't identify, it's just a little harder for me to differentiate for now." Naruto grinned, "I know something that can clear that sinus of yours right up!"

Kiba glared at him, "Don't you dare fart at me again, you brainless doofus!"

It was slight but Shino just managed to catch the sigh from Neji's direction as they entered the building. Shikamaru's apartment was on the second floor and Rock had already dashed ahead to probably pound on the door. To his surprise, Rock was waiting outside the door just staring, hands hung by his side.

Naruto paused from arguing with Kiba to give Rock a look, "Well?"

Rock looked back at them, "Shikamaru-kun has warned me that I am never to pound on his door. But I cannot remember why."

Kiba snorted, "That dude loves his bed too much. Just bang on it already!"

Rock hesitated again, "Truth be told, he told me that in the same way that Shino-kun warned me never to clap him on the back again."

All eyes darted to Shino, who was a little surprised. Shikamaru wasn't really that stern with anyone, let alone with Rock. Naruto groaned, "I don't care what he said, I want to breakfast now! SHIKAMARUUUU! WAKE UPPPPP!"

Kiba grinned as he moved to the door, "For once, Naruto, I agree with you." He started to pound on the door, adding his voice to Naruto's high pitched wailing.

Shino and Neji just looked on silently, knowing it was best to let the two of them get it out of their system. Chouji, who was fiddling with his scarf, turned to them, "I don't think it's such a good idea to let them do this."

It was Neji's turn to shrug as he replied, "Shikamaru knows how they are." Shino nodded, "What's the worst that could happ-"

* * *

And the worst did happen.

Kiba had suddenly paused, sniffing the air with a curious expression when the door suddenly swung open with the force of a storm, revelaing a very, very pissed-off blond kunoichi. Who looked like she had been sleeping soundly and was rudely awakened.

Both Naruto and Kiba stumbled back from the door, eyes wide and audibly gulping as she stared at them, (They heard Rock punch his fist, exclaiming, "Now I remember why!") a murderous look on her face. She didn't spare Neji or Shino her gaze, both dropping their head hurriedly, suddenly feeling that the ground was a much bett – no, safer place for their eyes to be. Shino could feel his face burning, and it was not at the sight of the attractive female in the shirt that was hanging off her slightly askew.

"_He's. Not. Here_." She hissed at them, taking a step towards them with every word. They could feel her fury like it was a thick cloud, slowly smothering them. Even Kiba was smart enough not to make any comments about her undeniably bare and fine legs. Chouji was the safest of them as he had been standing at the back, hidden from view, but was proving to be a thorn as the rest of them tried to fade into the background.

Temari suddenly grabbed Naruto's jacket and dragged his face to meet hers. He tried a grin but it didn't come out well as he looked into eyes which seem to promise a solid beating followed by a painful death.

"_If you ever_," she paused to tighten her grip on his jacket as her voice dropped to an even more menacing growl "_If any of you ever do that again, I'll cut your eyes out and shove them down your throats_."

Kiba blanched, forcing himself not to whimper. It wasn't like he hadn't been threatened before; the girls Sakura and Tenten, were constantly making threats at the boys but this… this just wasn't the same. It wasn't in the same league. The Konoha girls laced their threats with just the faintest hint of fondness to let the boys know that while they were serious, they had no intention of any lasting damage. But Temari's threat had none of that. It sounded very serious… very, very serious… the kind of threat that would haunt your dreams all night long. He didn't doubt that she would follow through with it.

Naruto dropped to the floor as she shoved him back, before slamming the door. They just stood staring at the door, none of them quite ready to make any sudden noise fearing that she would take insult at that and come back out again. After a few minutes, they slowly tip-toed their way down the stairs and out of the building only to meet with their initial target.

Shikamaru cocked an eyebrow at the group. They were behaving weirdly even for them. "What are you doing?" They jumped upon seeing him. Looking around guiltily at each other, they remained silent, not really looking at him either; even Chouji was avoiding his eyes.

Shikamaru sighed; he really didn't want to get into this now. "I just need to drop this food off and I'll meet you guys at the restaurant ok?"

Still no answer; if anything, they looked even _more_ guilty. He frowned, opening his mouth to say something when Naruto suddenly said, "Shikamaru we're really so-"

That was all he got off before Neji suddenly threw a hand over his mouth. Clearing his throat, Shino said, "We'll meet you at the restaurant, "as Neji tried to keep his hold on the wriggling Naruto.

Now that was more than surprising, it was downright shocking. But before anything else could be said, the group started moving backwards as though afraid to turn their backs on him. At this point both his eyebrows were cocked at the sight before him. But then again, this was what Konoha was usually like especially the group of nutjobs in front of him.

The group watched him turn back to the stairs but flinched as he suddenly turned back to face them. "Please don't make so much noise… if you don't mind." said Shikamaru, "There are … people… here that don't like so much noise in the morning."

Once again, there was no other reaction other than to look even more guiltily at the ground. This time before he could say anything further, the whole group dashed off. Troublesome, he thought, and just plain weird. Shrugging to himself, he proceeded up the stairs.

He would have to be quiet, he thought as he walked to his door. Temari was really not a morning person, and considering the state of exhaustion she had arrived in last night, it would probably drive her over the edge if he so much as sneezed in the apartment. He slowly inserted the key and turned the lock and peered in. It looked like she was still in the bed so he slowly pushed open the door and nearly tip-toed to the table. Too bad he didn't realize that he had left the door open which then betrayed him by squeaking ever so slightly…

* * *

Neji and Shino sat in the booth stiffly, knowing that they had probably sent Shikamaru to his death without even so much a warning.

Which was not nice. Not nice at all.

It was actually traitorous. They were supposed to be fellow geniuses, the three of them.

"She won't actually kill him...?" Neji looked at Shino uncomfortably. "Will she…?" Shino had no answer for that. They looked at each other, before dropping their gaze back to the table.

"Neji..? Are you ok?

Neji forced an expressionless look on his face before replying to Tenten who was looking at him curiously, "I'm fine."

"Are you s-"

"He's fine Tenten!" chirped Ino. "You can tell by the lack of expression on his face!"

Both Sakura and Hinata giggled at that as Ino grinned cheekily at Neji. "Anyway let's order!"

"Should we wait for Shikamaru-kun..?" asked Hinata meekly.

"Nope he'll be along shortly," replied Ino, who was looking at the menu. "He was just in here to get Temari some soup for breakfast earlier. He told us to start fir…"

She trailed off, noticing how the males at the table had suddenly stiffened at the mention of Temari's name. The girls looked around; even Shino looked uncomfortable.

"What's going on?" asked Sakura looking around the table.

The answer came in the form of the door of the restaurant, opening to admit a, slightly soaked, Shikamaru with … stuff… hanging off his jacket. He walked pass them, pausing only to glare at Shino and Neji who for some reason dropped their gaze embarrassedly.

That was really not fair, Shino thought. It wasn't like they were the ones who had been banging or screaming. But he kept those thoughts to himself as Shikamaru walked past them with another bag, again pausing to glare at Neji and Shino. The rest were also silent, knowing their part in what had probably just happened.

As soon as he left the restaurant, Sakura grabbed Naruto by the jacket, unconsciously imitating the earlier pissed-off female, "What did you dorks do?"

A little conflicted over this story as I feel that Temari isn't the type of person who would actually hang out at Shikamaru's place without them being married. But it was supposed to be a short, cute story so never mind for now. Let me know how you like the story. Cheers!


	4. Chapstick

He stared down the street. Which shop was it again? She didn't say it directly but the few times they had ventured for food in Konoha, she had always ordered the same dish. Especially if they were coming off some strenuous or troublesome job. It was like some sort of comfort food for her.

While he wasn't sure if the caliber of the food was the same in Suna, chances were that she would probably enjoy the same today. He hadn't exactly seen her, but he heard down in the Kazekage's office when he was there today morning, that the High Princess of Troublesome-ness was on the warpath. Something about having to spend 3 days crawling on her knees to save some idiot. Or something like that. He wasn't really quite sure and not that it really mattered anyway. Losing her temper constantly was just something else he had come to accept about her.

And his standard reaction each time would have been to clear out of her path; she wasn't the type of person to shout and scream at another nin but she had no such problem with him. The last time he had managed to make her lose her temper, she had almost burst his ear drums.

He strolled down the streets, trying to figure out which was the restaurant he needed. He had to do this quickly anyway, she was due back in an hour if his calculations were right. And he had a couple of other stuff to get as well.

Spotting the restaurant he wanted, he quickly ducked in.

* * *

Thankfully he had managed to get up to her office with minimal fuss. No one was really paying attention to him despite the items in his hands; they were familiar with the sight of him trudging up the stairs like a condemned prisoner. Reaching her office door, he paused, trying to hear if there was anyone inside. It wouldn't do for him to bump into her before the preparations were completed.

Pushing open the door (she never bothered to lock it; everyone was generally too afraid of her to even attempt entering the room without her permission) he set the things down on the side table. Closing the door behind him, he glanced at the window; she would definitely be back very soon.

He placed the cushion on her chair as he arranged the papers on her desk neatly by the side. Under no circumstances was he ever allowed to mess up anything on her table. That lesson had been learnt when, in a fit of irritation when she had accused him of not knowing what spontaneity was, he had stood up, pushed all the papers off her table before grabbing her wrist and throwing her on the table. Nothing had happened other than him dodging the knee she aimed at his nether regions and spending the next 20 minutes picking up all the papers and arranging it back to _exactly_ how it had been. Although he could swear there had been a smirk on her face.

Women… never knew what they wanted.

He carefully arranged the food on the table making sure that it wasn't too near the edge. She had a habit of thumping the table when she wasn't in a good mood. Stepping back, he surveyed his handiwork hoping that the soup was still warm enough when she got there. And speaking of the blonde devil…

He could hear her stomp every foot on the stairs as he shook his head. That was his cue to get out and quickly. He was about to open the door when he realized that the spoon was still in the plastic. Grabbing it, he quickly dropped it next to the bowl and calmly exited out the door and closed it behind him noiselessly. Spotting another open door across the hallway, he calmly stepped in, just as an irritated face appeared at the top of the stairs.

He waited for her to slam her door shut before walking down the steps and back to the Konoha Embassy offices.

* * *

He pondered the dilemma as he strolled down the path. Should he make the trip? It was never a good idea to say no when she was in this mood.

But at the same time, he wasn't quite sure if his lips could withstand another round like the last… or worse.

Massaging his definitely swollen and bruised lips, he sighed. It would definitely get worse. Just look at the way he had been suddenly pulled into that random dark alley and had his lips damn near swallowed. Not to mention his ears which were still tingling from the "tongue-lashing" he had received. It had been very hard to detect the instructions that had been growled, for him to be at the house in one hour's time; he had been in a sort of trance by then.

And that awkward boner that only she could induce. He had to wait another 10 minutes to let himself settle down before walking out the alley with as much dignity that was left. The rest was taken at the same time the hickey had been left on his neck.

It wasn't a good idea to say to her, not at all, especially when she was in this type of mood. She could be near feral sometimes and although that was very, very good he didn't want to …

He coughed; maybe he would get some of that mango pudding she liked so much as well. He was already this far in, might as well go all the way.

Besides, how much worse would it really get?

* * *

He stared mournfully at the hickeys all over his body and gently touched his swollen and, he was pretty sure, bleeding lips. What a troublesome woman.

He winced as he pulled his shirt back on. Stepping out the door, he decided that he would make sure to pick up some ointment later; she hadn't wanted to admit it but her ankle had been a little sore so he would do the boyfriend thing and rub it for her.

Not that she would appreciate it of course.

She'd probably insult him for being such a lousy masseuse and how her ankle would probably drop off in his hands. After all, the only thing he kept hearing last night, until she had gotten too busy to talk, was how cold the soup was.

So him rubbing her ankle would probably have her reacting in damn near the same way. Complaining non-stop. Until she got too busy to talk of course.

He sighed to himself realizing the truth; he wasn't kidding himself, he _was_ hoping it would get worse.

* * *

He reminded himself to get something for his lips as well before reaching her place.


	5. A Painful Introduction

He can't get his breath. He can't even focus his eyes. The attack had struck so fast so hard that he couldn't even recall the moment that it begun.

Before he can bring his hand up to ward off the next blow, it crashes through his jacket, knocking him backwards. Broken rib he guesses; the blow that struck him was no ordinary one. He struggles to get his hand into a seal as he recognizes the metallic weapon in its hands. He throws himself into the ditch at the side, barely avoiding the weapon smashing down on the spot he had just been in.

Crap his index finger was broken; casting kagemane would be a bitch. That is if he was even given a chance to cast. He thrust himself backwards and leaped over the figure, landing in front of the astonished Kurenai. Thankfully, the enemy hadn't tried to cast a wide area jutsu like a wind scythe as it would have been difficult to avoid while protecting Kurenai.

As it is he's not even sure quite what brought this attack on. He's hardly said a word when he had suddenly been attacked with so much fury and anger. He could see her eyes glaring at him with so much hate (_wait they also looked sort of wet lik-)_

"Urhf!"

Kurenai has suddenly grabbed his collar and tugged him backwards, making him brace his fall with his broken finger. He's alarmed; she's stepped in-between him and that crazy force of nature who is deep in battle mode.

He's dumbfounded when he realizes that Kurenai has a grin on her face and she's saying something which he can't catch fully.

"Listen… not …think… just …."

It's even crazier when that psychotic nutcase suddenly drops her fan on the ground, a horrified look on her face. Her mouth gaping as her fingers start trembling and as quickly as a blink, she disappears.

He's left completely bewildered by what has just transpired. Kurenai still has a grin on her face as she walks over to him and taps his forehead. He gets up gingerly dusting his pants as she tells him to not to follow the woman for now, which he has absolutely no intention of doing so. Ever. He says as much to Kurenai who just nods knowingly and asks him to pick up the basket of groceries for her.

As he follows Kurenai back to her place, he still hasn't been able to come to any conclusion on what has been a most perplexing event. They bump into his mother who is also carrying groceries, pausing to glare at her son who is dusty and disheveled. She apologizes to Kurenai who laughs it off before leaning over to whisper something in his mother's ear. Something that makes his mother chuckle.

He's ignoring that. An idea is beginning to penetrate his mind; something which he has been quite successfully sectioning off from his thoughts. His mother glances at him again, clucking her tongue as she fixes his collar and dusts some dirt of his jacket. He's still in the throes of shock so he allows he to do so, which evidently is cause for another chuckle. She tells him it was his own fault at what happened which makes him irritated because he was just introducing the pregnant Kurenai and mention that he was trying to be more responsible for his actions. How could that have warranted such a furious attack?

His finger is still throbbing and both Kurenai and his mother tells him to go to get it set properly and warn him not to make too much of a fuss about it which is easy for them to say. They also tell him not to be a jerk later and at that he has had enough.

"I am not to blame here!"

Even irritated, he's never been the type to raise his voice so it comes out low and somehow guiltily. He tries to glare at them both but it's not his thing and he's not that stupid to be disrespectful to his mother. They both shake their head at him and Kurenai takes the groceries from him and tells him to go to the clinic. She smiles at him letting him know that she's not angry and mother remarks how similar he is to his father. Both women smile a goodbye at each other before leaving him standing there, finger throbbing and mind disorientated.

He turns slowly in the direction of the clinic figuring that he could at least get his finger fixed and then maybe head over to the office to request that he no longer be punished by accompanying that insane woman around.

He doesn't put in the request.


End file.
